Friday, January 07, 2011
Last night I dreamt that I was in my old high school on the last day of classes before senior graduation.
I had anxiety about finishing up all my work but also an overwhelming sadness that this might be the last day to be with my friends.
The whole dream then turned into one of my recurrent nightmares - trying to get out of a place - but being met with conundrums and roller coasters.
I found myself navigating a series of airport terminals, baggage claims, long hallways, and lunchrooms, just trying to get all my belongings together, finish classes, and of course, eat lunch.
Lunch was important because it gave me one last chance to be with all my friends.
This last day, in the dream, was wrought with poignancy.
Thinking back, I don't even remember a "last day." I know I did work-study in the afternoons, as I had become toy department manager at the local Ben Franklin. Maybe, as a result, I didn't even attend classes at the end. I really don't remember.
But in this dream, I cried at the thought of never seeing these dear friends again.
I do wish I had been that tuned in during the spring of 1980.
I know that when we met in July 2010 for our 30th reunion, I felt a powerful connection to these people that I had known since kindergarten (1967 Auburn Grade School).
And I wished that I had been more in touch with them during high school and the intervening years.